When parents divorce, adult children rarely land in the same place. One of you is relieved, one is angry, one just wants everyone to stop talking about it. Then the friction moves to everything else: holidays, who takes whose call, what to say to a parent.
This is coaching for adult siblings who want to come out of their parents' divorce still on good terms with each other. Sessions are by video, so it works when you live in different states or countries. You can come alone or bring a sibling.
You can't do much about your parents' marriage ending. You can do a lot about what it does to the relationship you have with your brother or sister.
Coaching works on the parts that land on you: how you and your siblings talk about the divorce without it turning into a fight, what each of you needs from the other, and what to do when a parent asks you to carry a message, hear one side of the story or decide where Thanksgiving happens.
We work on specific, concrete goals, not on who was right about your parents' marriage. This is coaching, not therapy. We focus on what is happening now and what you want to change.
I coach adults. If a younger sibling is still a minor, a licensed family therapist is the right place to start for them. Parents going through a divorce who want help with how it is landing on their grown children can start with family coaching.
Often one sibling becomes the messenger. The oldest, the one who lives closest, the one who picks up. You hear both versions, you carry some of it, and you resent all of it a little.
Coaching gives you words for the moments that keep catching you out: how to listen to a parent without agreeing with them, how to say no to carrying a message, how to stay close to both parents without being recruited by either. Each session ends with one thing to try before the next.
Your brother is in Denver, your sister is in London and you are in Atlanta. Sessions run by video, so everyone can take part from where they are. A sibling who has moved can join the same conversation. Scheduling runs on Eastern Time and we will plan around yours.
You can start alone, and most people do. Changing how you show up often changes the whole sibling dynamic, even when no one else is in the room.
A joint session happens only if your sibling chooses to join, and never as an ultimatum from you. If more than one of you works with me, we agree up front on what stays private and what doesn't. I won't carry messages between you or decide who is right about your parents.
Most people work on one goal over 8 to 12 sessions. There is no required commitment.
A parents' divorce can hurt in a way that deserves more than a coaching plan. If you are not sleeping, can't concentrate or feel stuck in grief or anger that won't ease, start with a licensed therapist. Coaching works well alongside therapy, and I will tell you plainly which one you need first.
If you are in North Carolina and want therapy, Miller Counseling is my separate clinical practice. The FAQ page explains how confidentiality works in coaching, including the limits that apply to me as a licensed counselor.
Yes. Siblings rarely experience the same divorce, even when they grew up in the same house. You may have been different ages, closer to different parents or told different things at different times. Coaching is not about getting you to feel the same way. It is about being able to disagree about your parents without losing each other.
Start by deciding what you are willing to hear, and how you will say so without it sounding like a rejection. We work out the words, practice them and plan for the parent who pushes back. Most people need a few attempts, which is why we practice before the real conversation.
It adds questions siblings usually have to answer together: who helps each parent, what happens to the family home and how holidays and grandchildren fit in. We treat those as concrete problems you can plan for. I don't give legal or financial advice, so questions about assets, wills or support go to an attorney or financial planner.
No. Most people start alone. A joint session is possible if a sibling chooses to join, and never as a condition you set. If you each want sessions of your own, I will explain how that works on the intro call.
Ready to get started?
The intro call is free, 15 minutes, and no commitment required.
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